Are you there?
No matter, I'll just write this poem here for you whenever you happen to stop by.
The other day I was driving on the highway
And we saw a car fire.
My sister called 911
A firetruck arrived
The fire was extinguished
We went about our day.
But today, I can't help but feel
That my life is that burning car
And I am the driver standing nearby
Helplessly watching it go up in smoke
Uncertain and unaware of where or how to go.
My life is not what I expected or anticipated
Or anywhere near what I would like it to be.
But I am stuck and I don't know how to go where I want.
You're not stuck.
I am. I'm stuck.
I can apply, apply, apply for jobs
And not get them.
I am working a job anyone could get
with a clean background
and a high school diploma.
My college degrees were in vain.
Wasted time. Wasted money.
Loans that seem insurmountable.
I think of that story
With the train
That just thought really hard
And tried really hard
And got over the hill.
I really liked that story as a kid.
I tried to live out that story as I grew up.
But I did not crest the hill.
They will tell you if you try hard enough
You'll get it
But that isn't true.
You've got to have the right stuff.
And I don't.
I don't have the experience.
And I've applied for jobs that I would like
That don't require experience
But if someone else who has experience applies
They will get the job.
So I guess I need to volunteer.
I should have volunteered and interned while I was in school.
I should have done more.
Getting a degree does not guarantee you a job
GETTING A DEGREE DOES NOT GUARANTEE YOU A JOB.
It doesn't even always guarantee you an interview.
I'm not saying college is a waste
It's just you've got to have the experience too.
So you have to volunteer and have a job and get internships
AND study and go to class.
Then maybe you'll be able to get a job that uses your degree.
And suddenly I feel like I've done everything wrong.
I studied hard but that wasn't enough.
I had an internship but that wasn't enough.
And it all kind of boils down to this massive feeling
that
I am NOT enough.
And so my life feels like a car on fire.
And I am twenty-five
And having some sort of life crisis.
If you couldn't tell, I'm feeling down,
Sharon
